Real love makes us feel vulnerable. A new relationship is uncharted territory, and most of us have natural fears of the unknown. So what drives our fears of intimacy? What keeps us from finding and keeping the love we say we want?ġ. These defenses may offer us a false illusion of safety or security, but they keep us from attaining the closeness we most desire. While our fears may manifest themselves in different ways or show themselves at different stages of a relationship, we all harbor defenses that we believe on some level will protect us from getting hurt. Whether we know it or not, most of us are afraid of really being in love.
The answer for many of us can be found within. This leaves the question “why do relationships fail?” to linger heavily in the back of our minds. No matter what the timeline, the story of lost love is one most of us can tell. You may even have heard it referred to as “ National Breakup Month.” In this so-called breakup season, we may be unfortunate enough to witness once-happy couples splitting up left and right, or we may recount our own painful parting from a partner we once loved. The beginning of the year is often said to see a spike in couple splits, with various sources claiming that January hosts most divorce filings and couple separations. 13 to be “National Breakup Day.” They did so after conducting a survey in which 59 percent of people said that if they were looking to end their relationship, they would hypothetically do so before Valentine’s Day to save money.
What keeps us from finding and keeping the love we say we want?Īround this time last year, Virgin Mobile USA proclaimed Feb. Fear of Intimacy, Love, Relationship Problems, Relationshipsīy Lisa Firestone, Ph.D.
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